blossomdreams: (Default)
Wow, so like I didn't notice how long it's been since I updated. ><

Well, first thing is first hello everyone!! ^_^

I know it's been awhile and it's been an even longer time since I posted to Rainbowfic (though I'm writing more things just haven't been posting everything yet and I fell back into fanfiction along with trying to do two serial fictions, so yeah still busy writing wise!) I miss posting there though so I'm going to see when I can get back into that because Sam and Ed have been poking me like crazy, It's like "Alright boys I hear you!" Geez, cuties am I right?

I'll start this with 2015 could have been much better. While it wasn't as bad as 2010-2013 it still could have been better. I still miss my grandpa very much (he passed away in June) then having to deal with the same thing that happened with my dad all over again then my depression and anxiety going up with the following year along with my stress of graduating while trying to find a job that I can apply to it's been all augh!

However, it hasn't been all too bad. I found out that many of my worries about my friends not liking me was all in my head. We talked about it and now I feel so much better knowing that it was only my anxiety talking again. Then with my fanfiction I started posting more and I've been getting requests! Even requests to do collabs so that's pretty cool ^^ Then I'm graduating soon and looking into more things to do when I go to grad school. I still want to be an archivist, but now I'm looking into doing some work with analysis with books. Since I'm taking a medieval course (I get to read Lord of the Rings and play Skyrim for school how cool is that!) I'm noticing that many tropes and themes are just older themes changed to fit the ideas of the society at the time with residual effects from past generations. Like how the nice guy trope is very similar to the knight who has finished their quest for the princess and expects their body to be the reward which was something that hasn't really gone away only has a new name for it. It's amazing! I'm actually enjoying things again which makes me happy because now I know the depression I was in for 2010-14 is finally clearing up. I am so happy to be into doing things again.

I'm happy and terrified that I'm going to be graduating soon. While I'm happy to be graduating, I'm terrified since I don't have a job and many people in my family think that you can just waltz in some place and get a job when it's like no. It makes it even harder since I still can't drive alone yet and the women in my family keep trying to get me to either a) dress myself up so an older man can hire me (blegh) or b) get married to an older guy so he can buy me everything (double blegh) as you can see I'm not happy with either option. So while I'll be job searching I'm going to be working hard to get paid on Jukepop then editing things on the side because hell no I will never do those options ever. Plus I'm hoping I won't get kicked out too. I don't know if that will happen still don't want to take any chances.

So many sad deaths happened in the beginning of 2016. So many wonderful talents lost from the world, though they are still entertaining us in this world and I hope they are entertaining in the next.

Overall I'm doing much better than I was before and I'm working hard to make sure that I can have myself together at least.

I still want to see what's in store for me so let's hope for a good 2016!

How is everyone? ^^

I wish...

Jun. 10th, 2015 04:43 pm
blossomdreams: (Default)
How much my family knows it hurts me when they don't listen to me, tell me they really don't care after I explain something, sing while I'm trying to talk, act like they can't hear me (my mom swears she has this hearing problem, but she can hear me when I don't want to do something), and forget what I tell them after I've explained it tons of times.

Yet, I have to listen to them and if I don't then there's something wrong with me or I get snapped at or called such I'm an awful person because of it.

Then they wonder why I've stopped talking to them and have focused on trying to get out for grad school. It might be scary, but I think I can do it.

I just get tired of expecting to listen to others when no one wants to listen to me.

Except my grandma and uncles, they're one of the few reasons I haven't done anything drastic. :/
blossomdreams: (Default)
This is going to be long so I'm going to put it behind a cut!

Learn more about me... )
Writing wise I'm working on a bunch of original stuff including a Victorian romance story for this contest on Jukepop that's currently eating my brain because I'm always on the paranormal side of romance, but it's been pretty fun. I have Marvel ideas and joined the Marvel Bang, trying to keep up with my blog, and I still need to get everything set up. *sighs* But I am trying to make it so yeah!

Hope everything is well with you guys ^_^

blossomdreams: (Default)
Let's just say that RL is not being very nice to me or my family so positive vibes and thoughts are welcomed. Or anything fluffy really of my characters, your characters, fanfics, anything.

I'll explain in time, but I would really appreciate it.

Thanks

<3

So...

Oct. 6th, 2014 03:49 pm
blossomdreams: (Default)
I was told last weekend that I shouldn't be depressed because my generation hasn't grown up in a war like WW2 or something big like The Great Depression I guess I'm cured now! All my problems like the recession, my student debt, the fact that I didn't get a chance to grieve properly is all gone! Not to mention the suicidal thoughts I had shouldn't ever come back because of the year I was born in!

...

...

...People are great sometimes aren't they?

I had the weirdest weekend where I felt numb and I hadn't felt like that in a long time. So tell me something happy that happened to you or something happy you want to happen for one of my characters! I think that would help because you know my depression is now gone because of this realization.

I just keep loving people...

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